


i am afraid that i don't know

by lesbianchiyo



Series: Deaf Ren Au [5]
Category: Ookiku Furikabutte | Big Windup!
Genre: Baseball, Deaf Mihashi Ren, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-15
Updated: 2020-09-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:40:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26485816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lesbianchiyo/pseuds/lesbianchiyo
Summary: Ren worries.
Relationships: Abe Takaya/Mihashi Ren
Series: Deaf Ren Au [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1875820
Comments: 2
Kudos: 37





	i am afraid that i don't know

**Author's Note:**

> [swing lynn](https://youtu.be/bqSnxyQje5M)

Ren watched from the dugout, the air stale against his skin and throat tight — he felt like he had just swallowed nails instead of water. 

Ren saw the flash of red in the corner of his eye; _a strikeout_ and the cup in his hand grew unbearably heavy. 

Ren felt sick as he turned to face the field where Takaya was coming back to the dugout, his lips pursed in frustration and bat swinging restlessly. Ren couldn't tell if Takaya was whispering or sighing but his mouth opened in a weird way and Ren couldn't help but drown in the sadness of the fact he didn't know what was going on around him. 

He couldn't hear the crowd cheer his name when he went up to bat, he couldn't hear the encouraging words of his teammates. All he could do was restlessly wait around and watch the plays — and when they were in the field all he could do was watch for the signs. It made him feel helpless, that maybe the team would leave him behind one day; _like_ _Mihoshi_. 

Ren watched Takaya slip his helmet off, sliding it into his cubby. His lips were curled into a frown and Ren watched them open once again in a weird way when he turned towards the bench to grab his equipment. 

Ren tried to swallow another sip of water (the nails in his throat growing in numbers with every sip). Takaya didn't look up at him until he had his leg guards on and when he finally did make eye contact his eyes had lost the normal glow, jaw clenched in irritation. 

"Ren." 

Ren watched his mouth move, swaying awkwardly when Takaya waved a hand towards him, before patting the bench next to him. Ren joined him awkwardly, turning around to face the field a couple times. 

"Mizutani—" Ren's voice was nothing but a whisper under what he supposed was a roaring crowd. 

"We're going to go out there like before," Takaya stopped peering at him as Ren took in the new information. "And strike them out."

"B-but…" Ren nervously looked towards the field where Mizutani stood awkwardly in the batters box. _"Their third batter."_

Takaya smiled softly, lifting a hand to bring Ren's hands down, "It'll be okay." 

The way Takaya's eyes bounced around seemed unsure though and Ren felt sick all over again, his fingers wrapping tightly around Takaya's hand. 

"Are you okay?"

Ren shook his head, the red light for a strikeout catching his attention again. Mizutani looked pale as he ran back to the dugout, and once he made it under the cover he ripped his helmet the same way Takaya did; lips opened in a weird way. 

"I—" Ren loosened his grip, a small fear of breaking Takaya's hand growing at the base of his spine. "The t-t-team."

Takaya watched him sway awkwardly on the bench, looking away a couple times to watch the rest of their team hurrying back into position. 

"I-I-I,"

Takaya leaned down to press a quick kiss to Ren's forehead, the tip of Ren's hat falling backwards. 

_"I love you."_

Ren watched Takaya's hand drop with a nod, successfully swallowing the nails in his throat. 

"No one blames you." 

Ren watched Takaya's lips move, the rest of the anxiety bubbling under his skin washing away with a squeeze of Takaya's hand. 

With one final nod, Ren followed Takaya back out into the field. This time taking his place on the mound with confidence. 

**Author's Note:**

> ew the fact this is so bad 🤢 i'm just a bit overwhelmed with school so all i've been able to write is this crap agaksgak but it's okay because i love abemiha.


End file.
